Of Enjoying the Stillness and Accepting the Grace

A couple of nights ago, I was on the phone with a really good friend and we talked about the concept of "stillness." She explained to me that if there's anything she learned a year ago from where she is now, is that she needs to enjoy the stillness and just savor it.

At 24, that's a hard concept to grasp. I am never still. I always keep moving. I need a certainty and I need a goal. It's never just living, it's always living for. 

I thought that by  this point in time, this very moment, I would have gotten the goals I set out to do. But God has other plans and a different timeline. 

God chose my 24th year of living to be just that, just living. 

I've been reflecting a lot the past week and I realized that the stillness that I thought encompassed this year was merely limbo. I thought that it was this in-between that I don't know how to handle. 

However, the last couple of days made me realize that this year was about experiencing, learning about myself ,and understanding the who I am and why I am. 

This year was about accepting the grace, accepting that He is here with me and for me. 

I have searched within myself a lot this whole year. I figured out "the why" in different facets in my life. I realized how it contributed to who I am. I now have a good grasp on what makes me.

I always described myself as being who you ever need me to be, as long as I don't sacrifice my integrity. What I don't sacrifice became clearer to me this year. I am more sure of who I am as a person and who I am as an individual.

I am very grateful to the people who have stuck with me/joined me in where I am now. I will never understand myself as a person without the context of you and the context of Him. 

Now, let's get on with chapter 25?